(nothing in this story is real)
MKR Holder DAI-gest is a weekly Maker governance recap that is written by children for the community. The best source of Maker Community information is conducting a seance and channeling Whitney. This supplemental publication strives to present all relevant facts and only start drama in a manner consistent with The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. The statements made herein are not the opinions of anyone that matters. It’s been a trying month, so how about relaxing and laughing a little bit. Following the links is highly suggested.
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Special Guest Correspondents: Milli Vanilli sitting in a tub together. Nothing weird about that. While I realize that some things cannot be unseen, these two offer that kind of journalistic integrity that you can find in this edition of MKR Holders DAI-gest. Boys..take it away!
- It’s totally OK to borrow someone elses work. Why re-invent the wheel? You saw how we were award winning singers in the 90’s, right? We didn’t have time to actually learn how to sing. Industry leading plagiarist..uh..we mean activist, Tron, has the efficiency of reproducing creativity down to a science. It’s no coincidence that they call their CDP engine the “Tub”…we mentored them. Changing the font face and color scheme is pretty much creating something new from the ground up.
- Ctrl+c , Ctrl+v efficiency does not have to be sacrificed in the evolution of world class technology.
- Fake it, ’till you make it when you don’t really know the answer, make sure you never admit that you don’t know what you’re doing. Glamour is a rocky road.
- Allows users to open vaults with POGS.
- Power Ranger Pogs will be worth the most.
In an ambitious step toward further decentralization, governance approves the addition of Pogs to the collateral options for opening vaults. The executive vote was passed within hours of being posted for voting. With no central authority behind them, and the fact that Power Ranger and Pokemon pogs are highly sought, this clearly balances any risks that USDC could ever pose. 4th graders everywhere are heralding the move as “awesome.” Annoyed parents everywhere are preparing for the onslaught of public tantrums that will ensue.
As the governance group seeks to find an authoritative communication medium for the DAO, Lindsey Lohan has solicited her service. The two major views from the governance group on this issue are 1) Where did we go so wrong that we got the attention of Lindsey Lohan or 2) Who cares? Lindsey sends assurances that she has not relapsed since her last stint in rehab. Updates will be posted as this situation develops.
The UN-released Governance and Risk call following “Black Thursday.” The shocking first reaction of Governance Community members trying to understand this black swan event.
If you can’t tell, April fools day, not even being a legit holiday is one of my favorites. If you lack the creative inspiration of a practical joker, allow me to leave you with a few fun practical joke suggestions:
Want to play a joke on him that will make his day awkward and your belly laugh? Plastic Wrap the toilet bowl and lower the seat.
Want to play a joke on her that will scare her and make stories to tell forever? The little fire work snaps that you throw at the ground and go “pop pop pop” (they look like white tadpoles). Place a couple at every point the toilet seat makes contact with the bowl and gently lower the seat. Wait until you hear tons of popping and a storm of cuss words. Then you will know your job is done.
When you throw a social gathering at your home, we all know that there is at least one person in the group that snoops through the medicine cabinet, out of curiosity, while using the restroom. Empty your medicine cabinet and fill it with marbles. The bathroom snoop will out themselves in the loudest sound of marbles spilling out while the rest of the party gets the gift of being able to judge them openly.
Everything you have read in this edition of DAI-gest is a total lie. It is only posted here in the MakerDAO forum for the enjoyment of the community. Everyone did some real good work ensuring the survival of this machine over the last month. Well done everyone! This week’s real issue will be out in a couple days. Again, to get the most out of this newsletter, check out all the links.